Things We Did Instead of Taxes

The Square State Striders challenged themselves this spring in a multitude of ways. Not just figuring out the tax exempt value on the Arc donation form for a pair of Altra's with 500mi on them, but new and exciting running frontiers: tracks, roads, mud, ice, different roads requiring expensive plane tickets, so many. 

We'll jump in with some marathon reports:

Newest Strider: Phil Stafford, knocked out a seemingly casual 2:57 at the quad crushing Colorado Marathon in the Fort Collins area.

Colorado Marathon, the downhill doozy??? First official marathon, 2:57. -Phil

(Phil paid 43.95 for this digital image so we aren't stealing)

A trio of S^3 teammates wandered the streets of Eugene Oregon over the marathon and half marathon distances. 

Carson Rickey equaled Phil's marathon time of 2:57 but it was at sea level, but Phil was basically controlled falling down Poudre Canyon, so it might be a wash. Carson, a man who obsesses over every detail, had this to say. 

I may have been wearing a lifestyle shoe and I regret that choice. - Carson

And here's Carson strutting his TJMaxx finds down the U of O home stretch!

Cynthia Chau (proud graduate of the prestigious Lowell HS in SF, just don't google them currently) took a hardship leave from work to accompany her spouse Carson and Tom. As the trip was probably already a wash, she ran the marathon as well. Finishing in a dandy 3:42.

 

(Although Cynthia was did not send in a race report, her spouse kindly stepped in for her, as one might during a medical emergency and relayed this to our readers)

She would hate doing a race report I'm pretty sure. - Carson for Cynthia

Thanks Cynthia

Tom Caughlan, long time Strider, perpetually injured, and former Boulder country club lifeguard, braved the elements for half the distance of Carson and Cynthia. It took Tom a respectable 1:35 to get over the line from last years Track World Champs.

I definitely had a fat Matt Carpenter vibe with a windbreaker tied around my waist.- Tom

Tom, I emailed the race director asking for your most flattering pic and they sent this. 

Gerald Romero, whom I can only guess has mono currently because he only sent me 3 race updates had this report from the front lines.

March 3--- the spring run off 10 mile - Pueblo, Colorado Dutch Clark stadium along the river trail. 5th overall 1st place 50-64 

March 16-- the shamrock stampede 10k -- 3rd overall -- Castle rock. All rolling hill side walk paths

These are clearly pics of Gerald but I can not confirm nor deny the timestamps

Amy McDonagh, a true Strider from the get-go, rigged the NYC Half lottery and felt she needed a little treat to train through winter as a reward. Amy dodged a packed St Paddy's weekend of people to a 1:58. (being a previous NYC marathoner they made her use her maiden name as NYRR do not acknowledge our less than 10 year marriage)

On March 17, 2024, in a solid attempt to return to running, I completed the NYC 1/2 marathon. I'm not sure what I'm more proud of, the fact that I ran very even splits for the entire 13.29 mile race with no help from Walrus Man, or that I made it to NYC on Friday after traveling from California for a meeting on Tuesday, back to CO to watch Neil dig us out of the blizzard apocalypse, and then surviving the drive to DIA ?! Regardless, it was awesome. 

Amy clearly auditioning for the 2025 brochure

Melissa Stepanowich decided to off her oldest PR in the books. Not saying she put all you bums to shame by running a 36 min PR, but she just may have. Here's her take:

I started running in 2010 and ran my first marathon in 2011 at the Shiprock Marathon. I had never participated in athletics growing up, so I didn't really know how to fuel or what I was getting into.  Having trained in my hiking boots for the majority of my miles, my well intentioned stepmom suggested I should switch to the same running shoes she wore.  I took the next logical step and purchased a new pair of Nike Frees. My race nutrition plan was just to eat and drink from aid stations when I felt like it. My stepmom was also racing and told me that 5 hour energys always helped her.  So I took my second logical step, and drank one the morning of the race on an empty stomach.  Shiprock takes place in the NM desert with zero coverage and a port-o-john placed every 1-2 miles that you can see like a beacon of green light. The experience was bad enough that I waited 13 years for another road marathon.  I went back this year with the intention of creating a new, and fond, memory.  While I didn't meet my goal time, I was able to PR by 36 minutes and place 2nd in my age group. I am comfortable waiting another 13 years for a road marathon but do consider this an all around win - especially since toddler hype gives you a bigger boost than a 5 Hour Energy ever will. - Melissa

I'm sure your step-mom meant well. 

Sam Wood placed 2nd in the female elite category of DEKAFIT Knoxville, TN

(feel free to google what DEKAFIT is but don't blame me if Jason Bourne shows up at your house).

3 Complete goobers  Strider teammates braved possibly that most bonkers track race conditions at the Springs All-Comers Meet at Colorado College. 

First up is Jeff Olsen who can often be found riding Zwift on nice days and running in the Canon when the Sheriff's Dept is calling for in-climate weather evacuations. Ripping a 19:37 in truly horrid conditions! 

PR for 5k at altitude with excellent pacing from Neil McDonagh - conditions definitely deteriorated from being cold at the start, to wet with abdominal numbness from cold mid race, to snow at the finish, to an inch of snow cover 30 minutes later. All in all a good time in Colorado Spring weather!

(I might add that I did not curse at Jeff even once. Which shows immense growth on my part as a person and a pacer)

Brandon Stepanowich, who somehow is like a truffle pig for oddly unstandardized track races, laced up his 'lingerie shoes' for a metric mile in the 1500m at the All-Comers in somehow nastier weather than Jeff's race. Notching a 4:49 . 

The Springs All-Comers meet offered another shot to live out my mid-life crisis. Except instead of cruising in a Lambo, I got to run 1500 meters around the CC track. Knowing that other Squares would be there helped me disregard the rain turned snow, at least initially. But by the time the race started, I was already for it to be over. In my previous mile attempt at the Air Force Academy, I remember at some point mid-race where my arms went numb and tingly. This time, all that numbness and tingliness was there from the start. Despite that, I feel like I started well and ran fairly consistently. Somewhere during the second lap, Jock Jamz 2023 came blasting over the stadium speakers and whether it was truly there or an auditory hallucination, I could feel the fight or flight adrenaline surging through my body. On the last lap however, my legs, like blocks of ice, had no kick and I was transported to that scene in Rocky IV, stomping through snow with what felt like a log on my back. I ended up finishing in 4:49, but most impressively, pulled off the 3-5 Stapanowich/Stepanov sweep with fellow Squares Robert and Vitaly.

Unsure if Brandon just watched Rocky IV to prepare or reenacted it.

Neil McDonagh, fresh off pacing Jeff in the 5k, fresh off trying to put on a second set of dry clothes in a porta john while its sleeting and dumping snow , fresh off some lady opening the door while he's changing HEY I'M IN HERE! , was stoked to run his first heavy snow 1500m of his life, until figuring out that's not a separate PR category. Neil shoveled a 4:36 1500m.

I think my body was venturing into 'unwell' territory. Especially after the race when I didn't even have my jacket on but I was getting warm. I am proud to have been less than a minute off my lifetime PR over 1500m. I also almost lost count of laps. - Neil

expect a beefed up liability waiver at next year's All-Comers meet