But Did You Die (kinda)

Square State Striders risked: life, limb, social credibility and HSA dollars this summer. Let's hear about it!

 

It’s been a busy summer for the Stapanowich family, although not all miles have gone according to plan.

Melissa kicked things off with the Jemez 15 Miler in May, earning a top-10 finish. However, the real highlight came upon arriving in New Mexico, when her K9 training partner decided to eat part of a toy, resulting in an emergency vet visit and one of life's top-10 most expensive credit card charges. 

Brandon’s High Five race was unfortunately canceled due to the fires, but he is still alarmingly fit. These days, he’s putting it to good use as a stellar guide, dad, and professional chaser of two small Squares. He also had the incredible opportunity to guide Kyle Coon for the first 26 miles of the Leadville 100 as Kyle attempted to become the first completely blind runner to finish the race. While Kyle's Leadville journey concluded at Mile 52, stay tuned for next year's attempt and reach out if you have any interest in guiding!

And finally, there’s a new littlest Square in town: Mabel Stapanowich! Mabel completed her first six-mile race riding shotgun in the stroller while Melissa tackled the Leadville 10K. At 10 minutes slower than her brother’s 2022 Leadville 10K time, she clearly has some work to do—but at least she’s starting the trail-running habit early.

JT Teisher has single handed kept the US Postal Service intact, at least until the midterm elections. 

Here's his latest reports and a self portrait.

Brian Hall

New team member, proud Custer co High grad, has done other stuff since I assume. 

"Race" 1: CMHS Milefest. Did a mile at son's request, just mediocre enough to avoid embarrassing him.

"Race" 2: Palmer Lake July 4. Running slightly downhill makes four miles easier, but the floppy USA top hat was not aerodynamic.

"Race" 3: CMHS Twilight. Did the two mile slog in an unremarkable time but with remarkable fashion with a flowing wig to properly embarrass my son.

Ruth Black learned a lesson in immune sensitization and nature's karma.

While running with girlfriends at 5:45am on the Santa Fe trail, I was talking smack about my Kindergartner's rebellion against our vegetarian ways. In true karma fashion, a bee stung me in the lip. "Are you allergic?" one friend asked. "No, actually I was even stung on my lip while running last year, too" Half a mile later at the Edmondson trail head, I decided to turn back to the car because I felt like poop. I chalked it up to my month off running. But within two minutes I was seeing tunnel vision and felt like I was about to black out. I slowed to a walk, then sat for a while, then tried to walk - which quickly turned into a crawl - and then I just laid down. It was 6am on a cool Saturday morning on the Santa Fe, surely someone would be by soon?!I was feeling nauseous so I kept my eyes closed, but I kept looking up at the Park n Ride parking lot above me. A white passenger van had its window down so I was pretty sure someone was up there. A full 20 minutes later, my good Samaritan Dakota finally called down asking if I needed help. He tried contacting my husband (no luck) then called 911. By this point I had my shoes off because my feet were hella itchy, and I was dry heaving into the grass. By the time EMS arrived I was shivering uncontrollably. The rest is sort of a blur - a fine crew of Station 12 firemen figured the best way to get me into the ambulance was by carrying me up the concrete embankment into the park n ride lot. Sadly I didn't get to really enjoy that once-in-a-lifetime experience. Once in the warm ambulance, I told the guys I actually needed to puke. Wish that wasn't part of the story, but I felt a lot better afterwards. Enough so that when we drove past Criterium I offhandedly mentioned that my phone and wallet was in my car parked just right there. The EMS busted a u-turn and grabbed them for me, so I immediately called my husband (who was on a bike ride) and when he answered I just said "I'm on the ambulance" and his response was entirely too calm. When we arrived at Grandview, I was transferred onto the hospital bed. It was only then that my blankets slipped off and the EMS guy said "Woah, that wasn't there before" - my entire body was broken out in hives. There's now an awesome mug shot in my UCHealth chart of an incredibly swollen face, too. The ER administered epinephrine, Benadryl, a steroid, and an IV and I was discharged 4 hours later. The hives continued to move throughout my body the rest of the day, but I was completely okay within 2 days. At discharge they gave me a prescription for my own epi-pen. I asked if I had to use it anytime I got stung, or only if I experienced a reaction. The nurses' response was: "Not going to lie, it's only going to get worse from here" I have since been approached by no less than 7 friends or coworkers who personally know someone who has died of a bee or wasp sting out of the clear blue. Apparently, every time you get stung, your manufacturers settings can get tweaked. You can develop a bee sting allergy at any age, even if you have been safely stung in the past. Also I learned that a $10 medication was privatized a few years ago so they now cost over $100/pop and expire every year. Joy. Stay safe out there friends!

Adam Rich took it easy this summer and only did these races and by time of post has only raced the past 13 weeks consecutively. 

Miles for Melanoma 5k : 1 st place 15:55 I think. Race started

25 minutes late, and between standing around and the heat, my legs were done from

the start.

Father's Day Classic 5 K: 1st place, 16:09. Hot weather

and a pretty humid morning.

Before the 4 th “5K.” Not great when the pre-race email states the race will be

between 3.20 and 3.30 miles…. 1 st place, 17:11. Very windy conditions and very warm

out there.

Palmer Lake 4m 6 th place 20:44. Not a great day, and I didn’t feel very well at

all.

Cookie Chase 5k : 5th place again… 15:35. Not great, not bad.

Heritage Eagles 5k: 5th place again… 15:44. Always fun to run the Liberty

Bell course. Race was so-so.

The Heroes Journey 5k : 1st place, 16:09. Very warm morning

out there. The course had 8 turns in the first mile, a 180 at 1.55 and another 8 turns

back to the finish. Not a fast one at all.

Run for the Ring 5k : 1 st place, 15:40. Took two wrong turns in the

first half mile…. Ok effort; pretty warm conditions out there.

Arapahoe Warrior 5K: 1 st place, 16:07. This is one of the harder courses I have

run. The last half mile is completely uphill. Three straight wins at this event.

Miles for Migraine “5k” (not even close) 1 st place 14:55* again that’s a nope

on the time. Results showed 15:22; not even sure how that happened. Nothing to really

say here.

Jeffrey Eggleston is lucky we at the Square State Striders are big fans of grade inflation, so here's his winter report:

The quest for sub 2 is finally over, but that may not even be my biggest update. A shift toward 400 training this indoor season has reinvigorated my running and may become a more permanent direction going forward. The 400 has been a steep learning curve: stumbling goofy-foot out of starting blocks, going from invincible to blackout anaerobic in under 40 seconds, and learning how to fight for pole position before the bell. I've still dabbled in a few "distance" races, including a 9:29 2 mile at City Park and a 4:08 1500 (both eerily close to my high school PBs). But the 400 feels like the perfect new challenge for my masters racing journey. More to come on the track this summer. Catch me in a 400m-200m double!

 Potts Invitational 400m, 56.40, 29th

 Colorado Invitational 400m, 56.39, 13th

 Colorado Classic 800m, 1:59.75, 34th

USATF Masters Indoor 400m, 55.10, 7th

 USATF Masters Indoor 800m, 2:01.23, 3rd

 City Park Circuit 2 mile, 9:29.34, 10th

 Jerry Quiller Classic 1500m: 4:08.25, 21st; 800m: 2:00.79, 14th

Denver Distance Classic 800m, 2:02:52, 4th

  

Rationing races all summer like diesel fuel (very topical depending on when you read this). 

Mile High Mile in Boulder was an exceptional opportunity to get trounced by high schoolers in a different county, which oddly felt pretty similar to getting beat by high school kids in El Paso county. Neil McDonagh was able to eek out a non last place finish in this exciting track race in 4:23.0 , taking several tenths off his Colorado masters mile record. Retreating to the semi-climate controlled confines of his basement treadmill, Neil was yet to emerge until the Cheyenne Mtn Twilight XC opener: taking the neighborhood citizen race crown in 10:40 over 2miles of XC creativity. Capping what hopefully is the end of summer with a combo double race morning at the RINO 5k/Mile: clocking 15:52 and 4:35 in a one hour span. Even did the pretentious thing of wearing different shoes for each race. Won a nifty backpack (and gifted the 2nd place masters backpack prize from friend of the club Anthony Bruns so that his children didn't disown him for bringing home an unshareable treat). 

I have found a wonderful example for a task that can't be accomplished by AI. Sorting through Gerald and Kari Romero's absolute monolithic race reports. I encourage you to not to skim as there are some written and visual gems scattered about, along with what I can only imagine are mild to moderate cases of tendinitis.

PLATTE RIVER HALF MARATHON 

PLATTE RIVER TRAIL DENVER 

Gerald (ME)- 1:27:50

1ST PLACE 50 PLUS AND 3RD MASTER OVERALL AWARD.

KARI-2;16:09

WALT DISNEY WORLD SPRINGTIME SURPRISE HALF MARATHON WEEKEND

EPCOT FLORIDA

10K 

ME- 41:11

1ST PLACE 50-54

KARI(KARI)- 57:27

SPRINGTIME SURPRISE 10 MILE

ME- 1:11:07

2ND PLACE 50-54

KARI- 1:44:11

CHEYENNE MOUNTAIN TRAIL RUN 7 MILE

CHEYENNE MOUNTAIN STATE PARK

ME- 53:50

4TH OVERALL

1ST MASTER AWARD

KARI- DID THE 25K

3:33:23

1ST 45-49

5 MILE

GARDEN OF THE GODS

KARI -50:32

8TH FEMALE

THE COLORADO HALF MARATHON

FORT COLLINS, COLORADO 

POUDRE CANYON TOO NEW BELGIUM BREWERY

ME- 1:26:12

3RD MASTER OVERALL AWARD

KARI- DID THE MARATHON

5:40:01

KARI- MAD MOOSE VALKERIE 8 MILE

WOMENS ONLY RACE

1:45:28

KARI RAM PARTY 60K

RAMPART RESIVOIR TOO BUFFALOE LODGE

8:44:30

COLFAX HALF MARATHON

DENVER CITY PARK

ME- 1:30:48

KARI-FARISH HALF MARATHON RAMPART RESIVOIR ON AIR FORCE ACADEMY PROPERTY

3RD PLACE FEMALE OVERALL AWARD 10TH OVERALL

BOLDER BOULDER

10K-ME- 40:53

KARI- ANGEL RUN 10K  AT RED LEG BREWERY

KARI-  THE STICKS 72 HOUR ULTRA IN KANSAS

KARI GOT THE 100 MILE BUCKLE

KARI ALSO WAS IN A TORNADO THAT HIT DURING THE RACE .    I WAS NOT THERE.   THEY HAD TO TAKE SHELTER.  THE RACE CONTINUED AND SHE GOT THE 100 MILE BUCKLE

RAGNAR TRAIL AT SNOWMASS COLORADO

KARI DID THE 24 HOUR SOLO RUN

THE GREAT DIVIDE ULTRAS AT MUELLER STATE PARK , DIVIDE, CO

KARI- 25K 

3:25:36

9TH FEMALE OVERALL

THE COLORADO SPRINGS DOWNHILL MILE

ME -5:55

2ND GRAND MASTER

KARI- 7:52

GARDEN OF GODS 10MILE RUN

ME - 1:08:09

2ND 50-54

KARI- 1:31:34

KARI -- RING THE SPRINGS 50K 

8:42:40

SLACKER HALF MARATHON AND 4 MILE

ME-- 4 MILE- 9TH OVERALL

8TH MALE OVERALL

24:55

1ST 50-54 AWARD

COMPETED AGAINST THE ENTIRE KANSAS CITY HIGH SCHOOL CROSS COUNTRY TEAM 

THE FIRST FEMALE WAS ONE OF THE HIGH SCHOOLERS THAT BEAT ME IT WAS AN EXCITING BATTLE 

KARI-- HALF MARATHON

1:58:04

MOUNT BLUE SKY ASCENT ( FORMERLY MOUNT EVANS )

ME-- 2:12:54

2ND OVERALL PLACE

$150 PRIZE MONEY PLUS MY TROPHIES 

KARI-- 3:23:34

KARI- ROCK IT HALF MARATHON  IN CASTLE ROCK

2:52:26

VAIL HILL CLIMB 

ME-- 2ND 50-59

THE COOKIE CHASE 5K, 

ME- 19:44

KARI-- 26:44

10K AT 10,000 FEET , VAIL, COLORADO 

ME-- I DID THE 5K AT 10,000 FEET

VERY HILLY 

26:04

1ST PLACE 40-59.     

BARR TRAIL MOUNTAIN RACE

GERALD- 2:07:39

1ST 50-59 AWARD

KARI-- 3:24:20

KARI-- PIKES PEAK ULTRA 20K AT BEAR CREEK PARK TOO HIGH DRIVE 

2:46:03

SHEEP MOUNTAIN 50K

KARI-- 50K

9 HOURS 40 MINUTES

GEORGETOWN TOO IDAHO SPRINGS HALF MARATHON 

GERALD-- 1:28:58

1ST PLACE 50-59 AWARD

WON A GOLD MINING PAN WITH GEODE ON IT VERY COOL AWARD. 

KARI-- 2:06:17

GERALD -- 37 TOTAL RACES FROM JANUARY 1ST TO AUGUST 14, 2026

KARI-- 52 TOTAL RACES FROM JANUARY 1ST TO AUGUST 14, 2026